Grand, just grand

 Grand Canyon

 I don't know what happened. Everything. Nothing. Maybe just verbalizing my thoughts helped. Nah.
All I know is that I do Not feel the same. I think part of it is being out of NM. What a depressing place. So many people there that I talked to said that as soon as they saw the land, they knew they were home. Georgia O'Keeffe loved it there. It makes New Jersey look like paradise. (There, how many people can I offend at once.) I will never go back- unless I am on tour, and that's a long shot!

 Crossing into Arizona the change was immediate. The vegitation existed, the terrain seemed to change along with the feel. There must be some past life reason why I felt and noticed how much more beautiful Arizona is. It has helped change my attitude completely. The weather hasn't been the best, yet it is still amazing unpredictably beautiful. While on the phone with a friend, the sun was out and it was snowing. Not snow like back east. Back east we have snow flakes. Light, airy, wispy that melt as soon as they touch anything. This was more like that ice melt you purchase, little white balls that bounce when they hit the truck and let you know that they're arrived. Arrogant little guys saying notice me. So beautiful.

 Sedona

  I found joy. I found peace. I found reason. Hopefully it will keep the momentum going. Flagstaff, Sedona, and the Grand Canyon are so visually moving. You can't help but make that connection to spiritual. At least I can't. And to think I wanted to walk away from this. The lessons never stop, the learning never stops, the fear does get easier. I knew that if I could just get through that rough patch, the other side would be different. I didn't know that it would make me even stronger in ways that are difficult to express. I could simply say that, traveling has allowed me to focus on the life I want. Getting past the fear and loneliness has reiterated that focus into a strong desire, a need, a worthiness.